Saturday, January 3, 2009

Oops! Sorry 'bout That

Many thanks to Your Right-Hand Thief for alerting me to this news story from the heart of darkest Romania. There are medical mistakes and there are medical mistakes. I would have to adjudge cutting off a guy's penis when you're actually wielding the scalpel to correct a testicular malformation a fairly sizable mistake. It gets better. Apparently our careless cutter had been undergoing stress and lost his temper, so after he sliced off this poor guy's ding-a-ling before a "shocked nursing staff," we're told, he then "placed it on the operating table where he chopped it into small pieces before storming out of the operating room at Bucharest hospital." Talk about stress!

A court has ordered that the 36-year old victim--who will no longer be called "Woody" by his friends (actually, I just made that part up)--be paid $795,000 in compensation, which seems on the low side to me, but this is Eastern Europe, after all. But get this. Back when this happened in January of last year, the doctor's union in Romania criticized the first sum proposed: $200,000. Which raises a pertinent question. Just what value do these guys think is fair? I think a poll of 36-year-old guys in Romania, Togo, Oklahoma, or Osaka, to name just a few of the worldwide locales this poll would have the same results, would overwhelmingly value this particular appendage at a considerably higher price.

You'll find the full story even more bizarre: the doc received a one-year suspended sentence; the court said he had been "superficial" in his approach to the operation. Indeed. As for the poor amputee, well, his wife left him and he's now got a flaccid piece of arm muscle attached where Mr. Happy used to be. This attachment has only an "aesthetic" function. Right. I'm sure it elicits shouts of "Beautiful!" every time it's on display.

Amazingly, this was not the only Romanian penis story of the year! Doesn't it give you a just all over contented feeling knowing that there are people hard on (hah!) this subject all the time?
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