Is anybody else bothered by the very notion of eating contests? I read today that the so-called "world champion" eater of raw oysters downed 35 dozen of those suckers in eight minutes. The person who finished second ate 31.5 dozen. Brothers and sisters, that's almost 800 oysters right there, and there were several other people in this contest one guy who had to quit after eating 14 dozen oysters because he barfed. It's probably safe to say that these "contestants" consumed 2,500 to 3,000 oysters. To me there's something just obscene about "Major League Eating," a regular circuit that features contests that pit people eating hot dogs, corn, pizza, even asparagus, for God's sake. Only a place like the U.S. could be so crass in the face of starvation and malnutrition in many parts of the world. (Every 3.6 seconds somebody in the world dies of hunger.) Not to mention the one in every ten people who go to bed hungry in the U.S. every night. How many hungry people would 3,000 oysters feed?