Thursday, August 14, 2014

What Lawn Chairs Do When Nobody's Looking

I don't think any commentary on this story is needed. Although I can think of a few silly puns, and my guess is you can probably conjure up some commentary of your own.
SEATTLE -- Public nudity by itself will not get you arrested in Seattle, but police say one woman turned her nudity into indecent exposure when she committed a sex act with Beacon Hill family's lawn furniture.

According to police, nudity becomes criminal if it "causes a person to reasonably experience fear, alarm or concern." That was the case on August 4 when an "extremely intoxicated" 33-year-old woman wandered into a yard in the 78000 block of Beacon Avenue South.

With several members of a family looking on in horror, police say the woman "hiked up her dress and engaged in an intimate act with several lawn chairs."

She then began urinating on the lawn before "quite purposefully exposing her genitalia, and then posterior, to the family inside the home," according to police.

The family called 911 and officers arrived moments later and arrested the woman. She was booked into King County Jail for indecent exposure.
And wait a second . . . did you get that about "fear, alarm, or concern"? It seems this case might have indeed triggered the latter two, but just think about how slippery the wording of this law is. When is somebody walking around naked not going to cause "concern" for somebody? And note that the family didn't call 911 till the flashing started. That's interesting. I also notice how one lawn chair did not seem to meet the arrestee's needs. Interesting also.

Sorry, seems like I had some commentary after all.
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